bea_Ü’s Blog

yey! i’m finally back! [for a very while]

i’m just taking the opportunity to be with my family! huhu [i miss them na kasi]

anyway!..
i’m currently…

_beating a high score! @ orisinal games – just click this if you want to check it out.. [:

_into korean songs..

& we've just ended our pre-clinical rotation & we'll be starting our CHN rotation this monday [bukas!]…

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i’m dreading for our upcoming prelim exam! [there's nothing in my head!! *honestly* ]..

i want to share a lot of things from my past experience on our hospital exposure but i guess it’ll be silly.. [i'm just like talking to myself!!] duhh!! [: but i don’t care.. i’m happy..

wish me luck!

yea! i love it.. i got on a plane [& ALONE], for the first time! =] it was a nice adventure.. going to baguio, [i love the climate].. & everything.. i loved the view, including at the top, when we flew @ night!.. it was like stepping on the stars!..  i can’t express it through words.. glad i have pictures taken with my family..

wish i was able to see papo before he left..  well, i bet he’s happy already, & besides, it was great that he, somehow, had been the reason of our vacation.. thanks to tita zeny also!!=]

really, GOD is so great.. =]

i hope somebody would know what i am really feeling…
i am struggling and no one dared to ask why..
i wanted to scream, but i can’t..
i know it would be wrong, but what else could i do
i tried to smile, but deep inside i wanedt to cry..
i can’t be this way forever and i want this to end.
i feel sad ’cause all i wanted was someone to listen, & yet no one cared

The Counterfeits of Love

1. Love brings out the best in us. It inspires excellence. Infatuation inspires mediocrity.

2. Love is secure and inspires trust. Infatuation is insecure and generates suspicion and intense jealousy.

3. Love is calm and unhurried. Infatuation is rush and frenzied.

4. Love is socially inclusive - it widens our circle and invites ohers in. Infatuation is socially exclusive - it closes the circle andkeeps others out.

5. Love knows romance and spirituality are intertwined and fully compatible. Infatuation believes that romance and spirituality are separate and incompatible.

“Falling in love” focuses on meeting the right person
“Genuine love” focuses on being the right person.

it’s ’s day! don’t ask me, ala ko’y date .. hehe

just wanna express my thoughts!
..yea! i’m .happy,, not gloomy ..

& it feels just right, knowing someone’s waiting..

i don’t need those precious gifts,
sweet chocolates,
ice cream in a sugar cone,

fragrant flowers,
or pink balloons,

just you

o diba? emo.. hehe =] tsk,tsk..gutom lang toh!!
woo!! kain tayo! wee!

enjoy! =]

sending all of you sweet kisses

& warm hugs

yeah, i am..busy!!  woo!!, maka-buang na jud!

quiz diri, test digto, R.D. ugma, ka-tulog unya, late napud, rEading nasad, study sila, ako wala pa!, sus, exam na!!! ! waaa!! hehe=] give me a break!

have a kitkat! mu-dawat ko!! please!.. anti-stress!!.. valentines bitaw!! woo!!…

yeah! and i am currently infatuated with this one!! i soo loved it!!.. wish i could hear those words to be spoken for me!.. [nax] i am falling in love with edward cullen!! i thought that it would be a silly thing.. but i did.. nyahaha.. na-buang nah.. hehe. ka-lami na lang jud.. maka-kilig jud diay.. wee!!.. thnx shanine!..

click here..
it’s the rough draft of stephenie meyer’s midnight sun![edward's narration of twilight!] - my current obsession

actually, this ain’t boredom! i’m just acting like i am bored, though i’m so fixed up with my very busy schedules, tied up to my studies, without having time for myself[exagge], or even hangin’ out! [as if naa'y datung:]…

well, this is life.. i need to face it.. people come, people go!.. but the best part is, finding out who will stay in the rain with you!.. [char lang]

gi-mingaw lang bitaw ko sa ako’ng life 2ng una!.. [hah! nag-bisaya na].. it’s as if, i’m not me.. there were changes, some things were lost, some were gained.. but the good part is…

i am still me :]

Being remembered, either by those people I know, those I don’t, or both can be a great accomplishment for me, or even for all of us, especially when remembered in a good way. I consider being remembered as a task for each one of us, & even God wants to be remembered, but the question says ‘how’.

I have been asked the same question as this before, and I would say ‘in the nicest way possible’, and I have been thinking if that was really how I wanted it to be, and I know deep inside of me, it was not.

I really thought of being remembered by those people I know as someone who had moved their lives and had made it a better one. A person who had made them smile even for a while, or someone whom they know that will brighten up their day, someone who had ruin someone’s life for a day or two? but has been an inspiration for them to succeed, and a person who is worth remembering. I want to be remembered as a person that will serve as a model to all, not only on the good things i have done, but also to the mistakes i have made, that they would not be able to do the same thing again. I want to be known not only because of fame or popularity, but because of the things i have done.

Most of all, I want to be remembered by others as me. I want them to know the real ‘Bea’, someone who will help them when they’ll need her, someone who wants others to be happy, which eventually will make her feel happy as well, someone who wants to tell the world what she likes and the one who wants to express her feelings when she wants to; no secrets, no lies. I don’t want to dies without revealing what’s in my head, what i think and feel, and yearn for.

i’ve always been livin’ life in this HUGE place.. the thing they called ‘world’..?

i do laugh… :]

but have i really loved??…. i’m still asking my self ! i wonder how i love, have i loved?, i guess so… i love my parents! my “VIP”!, my friends?, even those people i hardly know…

i know how to love! i know how i love!.. but maybe, i’m just trying to hide it in the deepest part of me… am i afraid? …to get hurt?, to fail?, to disobey?… i guess i am.. i have just said it… it’s hard to love when you’re caught up on your own curtains…[getz?=]

[being afraid of hurting & failing]: ..yah! i am afraid, to take my chances, to get hurt, to put my heart into the risk of being broken.. but i am not alone!! everybody is afraid!… =]ayt?
[on disobeying]: ..but is loving really a sin?? God told us to love!, that’s His greatest commandment! and i was thinking i am going to disobey it!!.. but i am!! as what my parents is saying … loving at a wrong time?.. do loving really has a right time??.. aArRgghh!!, i just hate it… -guess i am not really free, not yet-

love isn’t really easy, especially when it’s what you call “true”…

do you really think i believe in it?.. nah!!.. people like me don’t look back and search for ‘true love’… i even can’t see that one at home! [my mom & dad are like best friends!-lol] i have only read it on story books, fairy tales, ‘fantasy’ it is…

but at second thought?, i guess it really exist! laugh at me but i can’t deny it… i felt so stupid this time, wondering why i am having this topic on my blog.. i guess i am probably like everybody[almost i guess].. caught up with someone’s arrow… & then, someone has just made me realize…

just wait till love comes your way, and everything you’ve been waiting will be yours.. then you will realize, everything that is, was worth waiting for…

i remembered… my mom used to tell me, “don’t rush, it will just come… if it’s for you, you’re going to have it in time…” though she wasn’t really talking about ‘love’! i am still able to recall that statement in times of despair[esp. in love]…

even that someone told me he’s going to wait… [though i didn't told him so]… he made me believe in fairy tales… just so i know, they’re right… waiting isn’t really hard, if you really have that will to ’stay’… so as promises can be broken, but were done because of that same will… [remember those disney princesses who have waited on their own bed for that someone to come and save them? which eventually made them live happily ever after??] lol, i felt like i’m one of them…=]

people really inspires me, and i believe it is God’s own way to say.. ”hey bea! i’m here to help you with this i have given you[life]!! so cheer up! you can do it!!… tira-tira!! ”.. haha yeah i am stupid… just so you know, you’ll be.. soon...